|
Symon's
Story
I'm
a twenty eight year old man living in the South East of
England. For the past eleven years, I've suffered from mental
health problems.
I
first began to encounter difficulties when the pressure
and workload associated with revising for exams caused me
to have a severe nervous breakdown. In consequence, I became
tense, anxious and frequently tearful. After enjoying a
long and happy childhood, I suddenly found myself trapped
within a very dark place, a psychological state of mind
that drained the pleasure from all my thoughts and experiences.
Finding
the situation increasingly difficult to handle, I decided
to approach my GP for some professional help and advice.
After a number of appointments, I was diagnosed with clinical
depression and obsessive compulsive disorder (I actually
suggested the OCD diagnosis myself).
My
doctor's solution was to prescribe a fixed course of anti-depressant
medication. Unfortunately, these drugs caused a range of
severe side effects, most of which resulted in my becoming
extremely unwell. Naturally, this did nothing to improve
my psychological state of mind.
When
my mental health problems showed no sign of abating, I was
then referred to a consultant psychiatrist working for the
NHS. At the first consultation, he presented me with an
interesting selection of rather bland questions. These included;
'Do
you believe you have special powers, flying for example?'
For a moment, I considered the flaw behind this question.
Since all fictional superheroes have a secret identity,
they would therefore be unlikely to admit to their abilities
by answering 'yes'. Brushing aside this philosophical speculation,
and quite aware of my own rather mundane origins, I answered
`no'.
A
further question was; 'Have you ever seen God?' For another
moment, I considered the philosophical quandary attached
to this. Since no-one actually knows what a God looks like
(or even if one exists) how would you know whether you'd
laid eyes on him or her? However, realising that straight
answers were required, I said something like; 'not that
I've noticed'.
After
a number of other questions that focussed on suicidal feelings,
relationships etc, I was diagnosed with manic depression.
This was most strange, since I've never experienced any
kind of manic episode. The psychiatrist offered me a mixture
of Lithium and anti psychotic medications. Unfortunately,
whatever combination I tried was an unmitigated disaster,
producing an ever expanding and increasingly florid procession
of nasty side effects. I ended up feeling constantly dizzy,
emotionless, unable to concentrate and intellectually stunted.
Under these medications, I could no longer feel like myself.
It was as if someone had come up to me and ripped out my
soul. The whole period quickly turned into a difficult ordeal
rather than a constructive treatment.
The
situation was not helped by the behaviour of mental health
staff I came into contact with. During my time within the
mental health system, I have been insulted, physically threatened,
patronised, laughed at, ignored and generally treated as
subhuman – all by mental health workers who were employed
to give support. Only a minority of psychiatric staff appeared
to genuinely care about their 'clients'. When I decided
to raise concerns about the prevailing atmosphere of irresponsible
behaviour, I was told in no uncertain terms that I'd better
keep my mouth shut.
Already
at an emotionally vulnerable period in my life, this treatment
pushed me into a further crisis. For six long months, the
only thing that kept me from ending my life was guilt –
guilt over how my parents would feel if I killed myself.
I held on simply because I loved my mother and father, and
I knew they loved me. I couldn't hurt them by committing
suicide and depriving them of their only son.
All
I ever wanted from the mental health system was some understanding.
Surely it's reasonable to enter the psychiatric services
in the hope that you'll find practical advice and a friendly,
helpful staff, ready to assist on your road to recovery?
However, in my own personal experience, this has rarely
manifested itself as a reality.
Further
on from this, my GP and psychiatrists at various stages
fundamentally disagreed over the nature of my mental health
condition. I've been diagnosed with a whole variety of 'complaints';
clinical depression, manic depression, OCD, social anxiety
disorder and possible aspergers syndrome. Each consultant
I have seen disagreed with the previous diagnosis and added
on a new one.
Faced
with a mental health system that offered me little practical
help, I decided to reduce contact with the psychiatric services
and embark on my own course of treatment. I've come off
the medication and have begun to eat more healthily. I use
cognitive therapy techniques to help control my anxiety
and depression (the only useful thing the mental health
system has ever taught me ). In addition, I have become
active as a mental health campaigner, a role which has helped
increase my confidence and general self belief. I now realise
that I don't need a doctor telling me what's best. I know
myself, and I'm aware of what helps me. And ever since I've
lived out that philosophy, my quality of life has substantially
improved.
But
how does this relate to the government's proposed legislation?
I'm
on the road to recovery because I was able to make a choice
regarding my own treatment. In this, I am extremely fortunate.
Sadly, many people caught up in the mental health system
are not allowed this kind of choice. However, rather than
trying to rectify this situation, the government intends
to increase compulsion and restrict choice further by extending
it's 'non compliance is not an option' philosophy. Under
community treatment orders for example, many patients will
be told what treatment they MUST receive, even outside of
the hospital environment and regardless of their state of
mind. I believe that compulsory medication is wrong under
any circumstances, and have great concerns as to what effect
this further compulsion could have on many of my friends,
colleagues and also myself.
By
proposing compulsory treatment orders, long term confinement
and other restrictive policies, the government is acting
to reduce the influence of patient opinion and rescind further
the rights of people diagnosed with mental illness.
A
great number of people have already been damaged by compulsive
and depersonalising psychiatric services. How can this situation
be improved by introducing legislation which seeks to weigh
the law even further against people who have been diagnosed
with mental health problems? Judged by any practical, moral
or humanitarian standards, it simply does not make sense.
Symon
Price. (Website; http://www.btinternet.com/~symon.price)
Back
to the 'Personal Responses' main
page |